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Grateful to be still

December 19, 2011

How do you find fulfillment and rest and peace when you feel stressed, drained, and overwhelmed? How do you carve out space to be nourished and refilled? Who refills you? What nourishes your soul?

God calls us to rest, and to make the space to be still. This is very hard for me, especially when I feel I am crumpling under the weight of all that troubles me. It’s hard, when I care deeply about others, and I feel as long I am letting others down, or am woefully behind on commitments I made to others.

And yet, I am thankful. I am thankful I had the space to rest with my children yesterday. We played, napped, and ate. I am thankful for friends. I am thankful we went over to a friend’s house, and we celebrated her son’s birthday. It was sweet to spend time with a couple of my friends, that I usually don’t have the space to converse with. It was good, for my children to play with their friends, and to simply enjoy BEING with people we love.

And it was good, to go to church last night. Good to be nourished–with food, by kind people who are becoming dear friends, and especially by You. We arrived late, and were focused on giving our little contribution of cookies, so they could be added to the table of treats for after the service. By the time we were ready to eat, most of the tamales and posole were finished, and yet there was enough for one more bowl. As You are simply enough. And I found a table to sit with my boys. We ate. And over and over, You were there. In the kind gestures and words and interactions with others. Thank you.

And we slept last night. That was good. Many nights of going to be around 2 and 3am had me quite worn down. I’ve been reluctant to sleep because of all that has been troubling me, and yet too drained to actually tackle it as I stay up far too late. Now, I am far more ready to do the tasks I need to do. Today’s snowfall is beautiful. And what a treat, to sit in a sweet little cafe that I’ve been eying for the past two years, since we moved here. I am especially grateful for the time to be alone, the space to think, and simply to be. Shortly, I’ll be meeting with a friend to address some work I’ve needed to do for her. But for now, I am grateful to be here. Grateful to be still. And grateful to rest.

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One Comment leave one →
  1. January 14, 2012 4:48 pm

    TThank you for this. It was good for me to read right now.

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